How do I believe in ONE way, ONE truth, ONE morality, and NOT become legalistic?

Whenever I hear a Christian talk about…

how gay people are going to hell and shouldn’t be able to get married

or how abortion is always wrong in every circumstance

or how REAL Christians don’t drink, smoke, or have sex

or how looking a certain way, or acting a certain way is sinful

I can’t help but be thankful that I’m not one of them anymore. There was a time when I thought those very same thoughts (and really believed them with conviction).

I’m ashamed of that now.

And I’m scared that it’s not going to be possible to make my way back to faith without becoming that same person again – someone stuck in their ways – someone who’s “always right” (or at least thinks she is) and never opens up to another point of view – someone who is judgmental and rigid.

I don’t ever want to be that person again.